The Race

It was the morning of September 13, 2014. It was a cold and dreary start. It was a sunny, warm finish. It was memorable. It was a milestone. It was a dream come true. It was the day I ran [and completed] my very first 5K! That is right, a 5K!

Okay, some of you may be thinking, “What is the big deal? That is only 3.1 miles-no sweat.” Well, let me tell you, it was a huge accomplishment for this lady. I will save you the long story for this particular blogpost, but this 5K is a proud moment I stand on for many reasons.

First of all, this was not any ordinary 5K. It was a 5K to raise awareness for, and to fight against suicide. This is a topic I do not take lightly because it touches me personally. Running this race meant that I was pushing for something I believed in and wanted to overcome; for me, for my family, and for my loved ones. Suicide may not directly effect every single person, but to me, this 5K was not as much about being the first to finish, or win a prize, but about praying for all of those who have been hurt by the weight of suicide.

I was fortunate to have my best friends right there with me. My roommate from college ran the race with me and that was a treasure-one I will cherish forever. My other best friend, waited at the finish line to hand me a banana, water bottle, and of course cheer me on. It was the perfect day. I would not have wanted to face this challenge with anyone else.

At the end of the race, we all gathered, wrote a name of someone we wanted to lift up in prayer, prayed, and then released are suicide awareness balloons in the air. They were purple. I never looked up the significance of that color, but that reminds me I still need to do so.

The second reason that this 5K meant so much to me is because it took place over my birthday weekend. I was born with congenital heart disease, which encompassed a series of complications, including the need for emergency heart surgery. I do not write about this to draw attention to myself, but to instead show you (or describe to you as best as I can) what God has done! All my life, dancing was hard; especially when I grew older, and had 10 or more dance routines in recital. Reason being, I was different. I could not catch my breath like the other girls. I could not push as far as them. I was unable to maintain the same energy. Yet, I stuck with it.

Growing up, I would go to the cardiologist year after year and see these yellow stars plastered on the wall with all these miracle babies’ running time accomplishments from their stress test results. I felt sick to my stomach every single time I would have that test completed because not once did I come anywhere close to those others’ times. Ugh. I wanted to make it on “The Wall” so badly, but never did. I knew I was different.

So about this 5K on September 13, 2014? —yeah, God did that, and He did it in me. I may not have been the fastest. I most likely will not see my 5K running time on a yellow star in my cardiologist’s office. BUT GOD, saw and I know He was so so proud of me.

I cannot remember my summer goals from last week’s post (haha whoops), but if I did not list “working out and becoming a healthier me” as one, I definitely intended to write that as one. This summer has already provided keen opportunities for me to get outside [my favorite place to workout] and focus on toning my body. I sure do miss dance, more than I could ever put into words, but this season of life has me focusing on my running and I could not be more motivated.

I am living with my cousin, who is a nutritionist and health coach, so I have all the resources I could possibly need. He helps me in ways I never imagined and I am so incredibly thankful.

It is with immense gratitude for the Lord in my heart that I tell you I have been running 5K’s DAILY now! Yes, you read that correctly. I have been making the conscious effort to put forth my best when it comes to my health. Running is not simply a way for me to tone my muscles, or get leaner (while both of those are personal goals of mine) but it is a constant reminder of how God has saved me. There is nothing more I desire in life than Him and to bring Him praise. Exercising my heart is one of those ways in which I am able to lift up His Name.

I am Bethany. I have a heart disease. I can run.

This past week I chose to place my focus on my surroundings while running. I have never been the one to run with music because, as a dancer, all I do is think of choreography, or try to run on beat. All of which are annoying. Instead, I run in silence, or recently to the “Love and Respect” podcast. It is amazing. Anyhow, I was convicted that I need to be present while I run- look around, pray, embrace everything.

As I took on this challenge I saw so many “average” “everyday” sites and yet, they were all so fresh, beautiful, and captivating. Suddenly, the dogs barking as I ran by, the lawnmower growling, the toddlers “racing” me down the sidewalk, the broken necks and whistles of driveby vehicles, the elderly gentleman sitting on his lawn chair, loud music from parties, smells of backyard bonfires, ant hills and recycling bins interfering with my running path, neighbors playing street basketball, and the beautiful sunset were all not so “normal.” I now look, listen, and smell the many parts of life that I typically took for granted. Never will I return.

What does this all mean? I am running the race to become a better me. Running is not only my method to remain heart healthy, but a way to let God speak to me. He is beckoning me and my goal no longer has anything to do with running a speed worthy of a yellow star, but instead, a full speed towards God. Running has never felt so rejuvenating.

5K Suicide prevention race September 13, 2014