Mind-Wanderings

As much as I write, I cannot remember what I talk about, who I tell, and when I share it. With that disclaimer, for those who find themselves reading my blog, first and foremost, thank you! Secondly, I am deeply sorry for anything that I may repeat.

For starters, I am beginning to embark on quite the journey. When life takes massive turns, I cannot help but think on them constantly. Well, yesterday [July 29th] marked the very day three months ago when I graduated from college at MVNU, and the day with which, in one month, I start graduate school in Pittsburgh.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

I strive to be someone who talks about a variety of topics when catching up with friends, but I think I have failed recently, especially within this past week. My mind is thinking about all things Pittsburgh related. I suppose this is only natural, but as you may suspect, I have searched for the deeper, spiritual meaning of my tendencies.

This past week presented itself with a bunch more God-me time, and with that, I have read more, explored more, rested more, and shopped more. Yup, I said shopped. Blegh. I will let you in on a secret about me: I really really really do not like spending money. It makes me feel icky. I am not entirely sure why, but I think it has a lot to do with not feeling as though I am ever going to have enough for emergencies. Since emergencies cannot be planned for (and I am a planner), I tend to shy away from ever “going out.” Eh…I could stay on the topic of fear and finances forever, but that was not the intention for this blog post.

Now that I have gotten off on a tangent…

So, reality set in for me that I need some things for grad school, which will require me to spend money. I attempted to change my mentality about spending money by doing something that I do love to do, which is make lists. Through app searching, I found one that is super user-friendly and syncs between both my phone and laptop! If you are one who feels satisfied after crossing things off a list, Wunderlist is the app for you!

I created a bunch of folders to organize what I would need by category. Then, I alphabetized the lists to clean them up a bit. I get super giddy about things having a place of their own and being able to see it all come together.

(You may want to stop reading now if my excitement is weird or annoying haha)

Preparing for Pittsburgh has looked like nothing I had expected. I thought my textbooks would cost me a fortune- but nope. I thought I would have to rent a UHAUL since my belongings are dispersed amongst three different locations- but god-family has offered to move me!

After two school-only visits, and one full city visit to Pittsburgh, you could say that I am elated to soon call this place home! The connections already put in place give me such peace that yes, while I will technically be on my own, God has never failed to intricately place others within my path to care for me.

Nerd alert (yet again): I have a cousin who now lives in Ohio, but was born and raised in Pittsburgh, so I decided I wanted to hang out with her so that she could teach me about the city. I came to learn Pittsburgh has its own dialect called Pittsburghese! This is hilarious to me. Obviously I do not want to sound like a foreigner, so over the next two weeks I am going to attack this new-to-me dialect. Hopefully, I will not come across like a wannabe haha.

Now a lil’ list for ya in case you too were wandering what Pittsburghese is all ’bout!

Probably not taken from the most reliable source, but here ya go (pittsburghese.com):

jagoff= a stupid person (I will probably use while riding my bike when drivers are rude)

hankerin= need or want

ice box= refrigerator

lunch head= (usage will be much like the “jagoff” term)

redd up= clean up

sticks=out in the country

yinz= you all

I also learned that “Pittsburgh” is pronounced as “pics-berg,” and “downtown” is pronounced as “dahn-tahn.”

There you have it. I am ready. Pittsburgh here I come!!!

But wait…

I have one incy wincy concern. Before I came out to Ohio for undergrad, I was ecstatic about creating my own space; apart from my biological family, apart from all things PA, and apart from my icky boring hometown. I still think I did all of those things, but I had no idea that my opinions about Columbus would change as much as they have within just this summer.

Four years ago, when God opened up the doors to MVNU, I was certain that Columbus would become my permanent home. I have god-family out here that love me and support me more than anything. I am a part of a church. ALL of my best friends from college live out here. I have barista opportunities in Ohio. etc. etc. Guess what? I idolized everything about Columbus, and I have never felt more conviction than now.

Do not get me wrong, Columbus and all of Ohio is absolutely wonderful (I know, it is a matter of opinion, but that is mine- take it or leave it), but idolizing some place leaves you nowhere good. I am admitting something extremely vulnerable. I put godly people and godly places above God.

Whew.

I refuse to do this again. Yes, I am excited and ready for Pittsburgh, but I do not want to come anywhere close to idolizing the city, or the people in it.

What have I learned? I learned that no place is perfect. I learned that no person is perfect. I learned that my heart can still be softened. I learned that my will above God’s is no good. I learned that I still have surrendering I must do. I learned that Pittsburgh will be amazing…if I step aside.

Four years ago, Bethany said, “Columbus is definitely where God is going to plant me for the rest of my life.”

Today, Bethany says, “Wherever God chooses to take me, I will go.”

Can I ask a huge favor? If you read this blog post, would you please pray for me as I prepare to go to Pittsburgh? It would mean everything to me.

For this next week’s short term goal, I want to commit to praying:

• for the city of Pittsburgh

• for the people that I will meet

• for the safety of my future apartment

• for church community I will enter

• for future peers

• for a future job

• for rest

• for financial peace

• for future professor relationships

• for my academics

• for a future relationship

• for good health

• for a future bible study

• for a future dance ministry

• for God’s ministry